Time – the most valuable Christmas gift of all (and it doesn’t cost a penny)

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if there was a special present you could give your children or grandchildren this Christmas – a gift that would provide fun and laughter all year long and didn’t cost money?

Well, there is – and it’s called “time”.

With the credit crunch forcing many of us to rein in our spending, it occurred to me that instead of buying kids expensive toys they’ll no doubt get bored with pretty quickly, we could instead present them with a 2009 diary or journal and a pack of cards. Sounds strange? Let me explain.

As a pack contains 52 cards – and there are 52 weeks in a year – you stick on to each card (and a page in the journal) a label detailing a corresponding activity or an outing tailored to the child’s age. For example, the one of hearts might say “a hug from Mummy”, the King of Spades could state “A day at the beach with Grandma and Grandpa” and the ace of clubs might offer “one hour playing board games.”

Each week throughout the coming year the child “spends” the cards and records in the diary – with words, pictures and even photographs – all the different things they’ve done. At the end of year, they will have a lasting memento of 52 weeks in which they received the most valuable gift a parent or grandparent can give – their time.

What is so great about a present like this is that it builds into our busy lives a parcel of time that is dedicated solely to our child or grandchild. We might think we give that child our time already – but if we’re simply sitting in the same room while they watch television and we send text messages, we’re not interacting or bonding in a meaningful way.

By writing out “promises” on cards, it makes us carry them out, even if there are a hundred and one other things we feel we should be doing. After all, there are few things more important than deepening our relationships with our children or grandchildren through “face to face” time.

A “time” gift can be especially beneficial if a marriage is in difficulty. Parents can be so taken up with their own problems that they overlook the needs of their children. Similarly, marriage breakdown can – either deliberately or inadvertently – push grandparents out of the picture.

Promising to spend quality time every week of the coming year with a child commits you to organising your lifestyle in such a way that makes it possible. If, for instance, you are a grandparent who lives a long way away from your grandchild, you might arrange to see them for a weekend every month, during which you “spend” the preceding four cards’ worth of activities.

If you’re a parent struggling to maintain your marriage, getting your spouse to join you in giving a “time” gift to your child could go some way to improving your relationship. Even something as simple as a game of snap could help to remind you that you are a family. And you might decide you still want to be a family by the time the journal is completed at the end of the year.