Well, here we are at the end of January - a traditionally depressing time for many people. Christmas is a distant memory, the weather is miserable, spring still seems a long way off and, this year, the economic meltdown is taking its toll.
Another reason lots of us feel fed up around this time is that our New Year Resolutions, made with such optimism and determination a month ago, are starting to crumble or have bitten the dust completely.
There are several reasons why many New Year Resolutions are doomed to failure - they are over-ambitious, they are about self-denial or they simply get sidelined and forgotten about. In some cases, it doesn't matter too much - it's not the end of the world if you don't manage to shed a couple of excess pounds by the end of January, for example.
It often strikes me that resolutions actually miss the point - that they are an attempt to paper over the cracks of a problem rather than tackle it head on.
If your marriage is going through a bad patch, it might be tempting to try to make peripheral changes, such as getting fit or losing weight, in the (possibly subconscious) belief that doing so will improve your relationship.
Sometimes it can, but difficulties in a marriage are often about much more than whether one of you could do with shrinking a dress size.
In today's world, long working hours are a common cause of a strained marriage: if you don't spend much quality time with your partner, it's inevitable you will grow apart emotionally. The current financial crisis is likely to put added pressure on couples - they may fear losing their jobs, having to take a salary cut or having their home repossessed. Putting in even longer hours at the office might seem the only way forward if you are to survive redundancy.
Meanwhile, families anxious about the deepening recession may feel they ought to dispense with luxuries such as going out for dinner once a week or booking a sunshine holiday.
If you are worried about the economic situation and your marriage isn't in tip-top condition, the combination could spell serious trouble.
Here, then, are a few ideas for non-new year resolutions that could help bolster your marriage in these difficult times:
· However hard you are working, arrange a "date night" with your partner once a week and do something you both enjoy
· Don't push financial concerns under the carpet - talk about them and explore ways of cutting your monthly output. Remember, too, that you're in this together
· Swap going out to a swanky restaurant once a week with cooking a special meal together at home. It's cheaper and can be more intimate than being in a crowded, noisy restaurant
· Recycle clothes you've relegated to the back of the wardrobe - dress them up with accessories to make them seem like a new outfit. And wear them in the evening to make you feel more attractive around your partner
· Cultivate shared interests that don't cost money - walking, cycling, reading the same book and then discussing it
· Limit the amount of time you spend playing on the computer in the evening - talk to each other or do a crossword together instead
· Make time for sex. When you're worried and tired, sex can be the last thing on your mind, but being close to your partner physically can re-forge emotional ties
· Don't lose sight of the fact that however parlous the financial situation, sharing your life with people you love - and who love you - are more important than the biggest City bonuses.
